Joe Maller.com

I got a letter from 20th Century Fox because my name is Joe. I quote:

Twentieth Century Fox wants to invite YOU and a guest to a special preview screening of

joesomebody

On Wednesday, December 19 @ 7pm.

This is a screening just for Joes!

I’m not going for any number of reasons. However the screening is Wednesday December 19th at 7pm somewhere in New York City, if anyone wants to impersonate me, or just pretend to be named Joe, call (212) 556-8627 to reserve two seats to the screening. Oh just call anyway. Call and tell them your name isn’t Joe and that you found this promotion discriminatory. Call and ask what their name is. Call and tell them you’d love to be there, but your middle name is Phil, and you’ll be at the Phil Somebody screening, which is rumored to have a really wild party afterwards.

joesomebody poster perspective diagram
While I’m on the subject, the boxing glove on the Joe Somebody poster was an afterthought and looks it. First, it was Photoshop’d on to high, so it looks like Tim Allen’s hand was amputated. There is quite a bit of padding on the face of a boxing glove which would extend well below the horizontal plane of his right hand, but the glove seems to have been placed on at the natural end of his hand, ignoring any room for padding. In this diagram, the green lines are perspective lines based on Tim Allen’s body. The yellow outline is where the boxing glove would have been if he’d been wearing it in the shot., follow the lines forward from his right hand and see where it should have been. Additionally, the lighting is wrong, the glove shadows are further around the glove than the shadows on his shirt and pants, the glove is tied way above his wrist and is positioned at an unnatural angle.

A fundamental fact of visual perspective is that the visible horizon will pass proportionally through every object at the same height no matter how far it is from the viewer. Based on the building behind Mr. Allen and the arrangement of space, he’d have to be 50-60 feet tall. Try looking at the image and forgetting for a second that he has to be human sized, think “giant”. Part of the reason for that effect is the photo of the building was taken closer to it’s base and looking up, so we’re seeing the top of a larger structure distorted towards a vertical vanishing point.


Yes, it’s a movie poster and it’s not supposed to look real, but there’s a difference between effective and sloppy.


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