I’m filled with an incredible sense of sadness. Tonight I walked around the neighborhood listening to people. There is nothing else to talk about. It felt kind of like what I imagine an Irish wake would be like. People were drinking in bars and telling stories about the buildings.

It is likely that I will have known someone who died. There have been no meaningful figures or statistics yet, but the number of lives lost will be ghastly. Too many people worked down there and New York City is too small a town not to know a victim.

A few weeks ago my brothers and I visited the towers. I’ve spent a lot of time wandering around down there and recognize every location on the news. It will be unnerving to walk around down there in a few weeks when downtown opens again.

Walking around, there were two moments where I almost lost it. My overall numbness has been baffling. I’ve never teared up, never cried, just floated between numb and sad. If or when I do finally break down it will be a relief. Today has been inconceivably horrible. I can turn off the TV but the real thing is happening just down the street. Sirens go by a couple times an hour breaking the unnatural quiet which has settled over our neighborhood.

I’m going to bed early though I doubt I’ll sleep through the night.

The phones are still iffy, if anyone needs to reach us, use AOL IM.

I had my mother call the Red Cross in California and she found out that I can’t give blood. There doesn’t seem to be much to do besides that. It’s best to just stay out of the way.

I’m still struck by the quiet in the city. Everyone is speaking in hushed voices and staring at the cloud of smoke in disbelief. The sky where the buildings were seems like a disfigurement.

The phones are out, if anyone needs to reach us, use AOL IM.

We’re looking into giving blood. I can’t get through to the American Red Cross at 1-800-GIVE-LIFE (1-800-448-3543). If anyone can find out anything, please let me know. I’ve been to Morocco in the past year and took anti-malaria medication for a trip to Thailand in 1998. I almost feel like lying to them but I know that would be worse.

The phones are out, if anyone needs to reach us, use AOL IM.

We’re about 2 miles (2.5 Km) from where the towers were. It’s would be a beautiful day otherwise. The sun is out and there are no clouds in the sky.

My friend Dave Park just came over. We saw a city bus coming up Avenue A covered in soot. The cloud of dust is starting to reach us, there is a dusty taste in the air, most of the soot looks like powedered accoustic tile.

The flow of people on Avenue A has reversed, now people are walking downtown presumably to look.

I’ve been watching the news about the World Trade Center attacks all morning. I’m completely in shock, alternating between shaking and numbness. Both buildings are gone. It feels like an amputation.

The city is incredibly quiet. Occasionally sirens will go by or be heard in the distance. Crowds of people are walking up my street away from where the towers were. Some are listening to radios, other are stopping and hugging others. Faces are calm, some people are hurrying, others are biting their nails or hunching their shoulders.

The phones are out, if anyone needs to reach us, use AOL IM.